According to Dr. Gary Chapman, there are five main love languages, and each of us has one that we speak more fluently than the others. When you understand your own love language, it becomes easier to express your feelings to those around you and to empathize with other people’s feelings towards you. But what is your love language In this article, we will be explaining how to determine your own love language so that you can improve your relationships with friends, family, and potential partners by knowing what they need from you in order to feel loved and satisfied.
1) Focus on your loved ones and see what they do
Learning about your partner’s love language will give you insight into what they need from you in order to feel loved. By taking an active interest in your loved ones, you are showing them that they matter. And by giving them what they need, you are expressing your love for them and helping to build a strong foundation for a healthy relationship. If you are married or dating someone with whom you want to spend your life, take a few minutes now to learn more about their love language. It could be one of these, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gifts, or Acts of Service.
2) Watch what you do when you love
You don’t just have a love language. When you love, you express your love in all five languages. There are actions that you naturally do when you feel loved, cared for, and appreciated by others. For example, if words of affirmation are your primary love language, then you will find yourself speaking kindly and encouragingly to those around you. If quality time is your love language, then you will spend more time with people than most other people. And so forth. By watching what you do when you love, it becomes easier to identify your own personal love language. Once identified, seek out opportunities to speak your partner’s love language consistently. Even better, make it a habit.
3) Use your own behavior as a clue
If you’re wondering what kind of language your partner understands, pay attention to what behaviors make them feel loved and appreciated. For example, if they appreciate it when you do little things for them around the house or buy thoughtful gifts for their birthday, then acts of service are probably a good bet. On the other hand, if they tell you that they love it when you cuddle with them in bed at night or say I love you often throughout your day, then words of affirmation might be more appropriate.
4) Consider the goal of love
Though your love language may be different from your partner’s, it’s still important to try and understand his or her love language. Communicating effectively helps avoid hurt feelings and fights. If you are aware of each other’s love languages, you can use them as a tool for improving communication in your relationship. You can also take steps to incorporate more of your partner’s love language into your life. For example, if he or she feels most loved through physical touch, you might give him or her a back rub when they get home from work.
Each person has a different love language. What do you think is yours? Don’t know? Take our quiz! Then discuss your results with your partner. How does he or she show his or her love for you? Does he make time for you, take care of you when you’re sick, bring you small gifts and surprises, pick up flowers for no reason at all, etc.? That’s your partner’s love language.